Hey. So I haven't blogged in a while. I don't really know why. Well, I guess I do. You see, life is pretty up in the air for us right now (update for those who haven't heard: we're not going to Brazil anymore, long story) and I guess I've been waiting to have something substantial to report, but that hasn't happened yet. Since our return from New York we've just been laying low, playing the waiting game while living with my ever-gracious parents in Salt Lake. I'm so thankful to them but I can't help feeling like we're in a bit of a rut. Why is it that our lives seem to be perpetually on hold? Sometimes I feel like an exciting life is out there and I'm just standing by and watching it pass. It doesn't help when I look at other friend's blogs or blogs of friend's of friends and see these incredible people living amazing lives that I can't help but envy (this includes those just simply living a happy, normal day-to-day lifestyle). And I wonder, what do I possibly have to blog about that could interest anyone?
Being in this position of ours has brought a wave of emotions. I go from feeling like, "why isn't life what I want it to be right now? why can't life be easier sometimes?" to the next minute - while holding precious Ethan in my arms or seeing a big grin on his face -feeling like life couldn't get any better than this. Thank goodness for that little baby who makes our lives such a joy, who keeps us going and helps us focus on what matters most and why we're really here; I have to remind myself that it's not necessarily to travel the world, to have a fun job or to live in an amazing city - although I've had the opportunity to do those types of things in the past and I really hope to do more in the future. But being a mother has truly brought to me a happiness that has surpassed all of those other things. And although it's not a trip to Europe or a new house, I get to witness special moments like this everyday:
I'm really sorry for venting on this blog. I didn't intend to when I started this post or to get so personal. I recognize I'm not alone in feeling this way and that everyone has lows their in life in one form or another. I know how blessed I am. Having Bret as my companion and best friend, is much more than I could ever deserve. I'm so thankful for the amazing man and husband he is. I look forward to continuing through life's adventures, in its many shapes and forms, with both him and my children. They say life isn't a race and I believe that's true, but I do sometimes feel like it's a marathon. That each day, though simple and mundane as it may be at times, is a step towards something bigger and more wonderful that I hope to attain at the end of it all. It sure helps having cute little friends like this, too.
7 comments:
Beautiful post Lu and that is one beautiful baby.
That is one darling baby.
Hang in there girl. I know how bad it stinks when life doesn't seem to go in the direction you planned. Hopefully something will turn up soon!
I'm responding to you here too just in case you don't get the other one- I never really know where to respond! I'm lame. anyway- I'm dying to meet Ethan- he is SO adorable! The hat is from Old Navy and it's amazing- it keeps his head so warm and, bonus- he gets tons of compliments when he wears it! :) I think Gap has a similar one too. Bald heads are cute, but cold.
Side note, I loved this post. I totally know how frustrating life is and I really liked reading your thoughts. I feel the same way sometimes about not having an exciting life so I really liked reading this. I'm sorry about Brazil and I'm sure things will turn around soon!
I love that boy Ethan of yours. I'm sorry you feel like you guys are in a rut; I totally know how that feels. But I hope you know how awesome we think you are!
Wow, your baby totally has your eyes! He is so cute! Sorry that you're feeling let down right now. I like to think of life in terms of "sets," you know, like you do a set of 5 reps for weight lifting or something, and then you rest and then you do 5 more and on and on until you're done (and your muscles are huge)... that's life. Just get through this "set" and then you can rest. I hope everything works out for the best! Oh, I just thought of something... there is this talk called "The Currant Bush" by Hugh B. Brown, and I think you would really appreciate it (just from what you shared here). It's a really good talk that puts life in perspective when we have those moments when we're not sure what's going on. Here's a link to it:
http://lds.org/new-era/1973/01/the-currant-bush?lang=eng
I'm sorry Lu. I understand how you feel in someway. Sometimes life throws us curve balls and we don't know why we are in a certain situation that we don't really want to be in. I am there right now- watching others enjoy blessings that I want so badly, but I guess the whole plan is to teach us to trust who is really in charge. Hope all is well with you guys!
you are not a debbie downer...i think it was a gertie grateful. :) don't know why that name came to mind first. but life is good...it will all work out and while you go through it all you get to be with your completely adorable little family. love you!
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